Weekend of Blessing

I'm not much of a blog updater when it comes to every small detail of my life, but I just wanted to share about how faithful the Lord has been lately, especially when it comes to my family.  Going home isn't ever overly exciting for me, and I've really been praying that the Lord increase my capacity to love and fill my heart with Kingdom grace.  The fruit of this prayer hasn't been all easy and joyful, it's been challenging -- and to be honest, I haven't responded with the grace that I've been diligently praying for.  After this weekend, I'm finally seeking after the Lord's increase in my life, and it's changed my perspective in all kinds of ways.  All that being said, this last time of family and fellowship was one of the most blessed.  Just a simple, quiet thanksgiving with my mom and brother and some sweet time with dad, followed by lots of fun with the greatest friends.  I'm really blessed and couldn't ask for more. 

The weekend in pictures --

My sweet brother cooking some delicious turkey for mom & I.  Proud of him and how he's just stepped up to the plate.

Beautiful mom cooking the rest of our delicious meal -- It's amazing that for having a mom that's such a good cook, I really struggle cooking.  Big shoes to fill, I guess!

On Friday, I went to Raleigh to spend some time with my roommate and her wonderful family and I was completely honored to share in tree decorating tradition with them.  This wasn't ever a big deal in my house, so it was so cool to see how special it was for their family, nevermind to be invited to be a part of it.

Saturday morning, I shared in the most wonderful coffee/breakfast with Liz and her mom and friends.  I just wanted to share this picture because the coffee looked cool and tasted way better than it looks.

Then I traveled over a little farther to go to the NC State game with my old roommate and some of her friends.  It was seriously one of the best football games I've ever seen, and I'm thankful that I made the trip.

What weekend of gratefulness wouldn't be complete without meeting a celebrity?  Okay, so this is the only one I've ever met, but I've been thankful before.  Anyway, Sarah and I went up into the box with her boyfriend's mom for a second just to check it out and lo and behold, Scotty McCreery was also in our box.  What a cool kid who is doing big things in this state.  And yes, his celeb status made me incredibly nervous.

So thankful just for an opportunity to create unforgettable memories with family & friends!  That's something that I definitely don't take for granted!  I'm seriously so blessed.

thoughts from a grateful heart.

Sometimes it's good to just remind yourself of how blessed you've been in your journey of life.  Not just because it's Thanksgiving week, but because my life is good, the Lord is good, and I am so fortunate.  Have there been hard times?  Absolutely.  Have I wanted to throw in the towel?  More times than I can count.  But, when I look things over, I am just so thankful for how much I've experienced, been blessed, been favored and all of the people who make my life as full as it is.  In thinking of what I'm most thankful for, here's a list of a few of those things:

1. I am thankful to serve a God who relentlessly loves, forgives, gives grace, provides, answers, consoles, makes a way out of no way and has the best listening skills.
2. I am thankful for a family who, while they are not perfect (and neither am I), have provided a path of life that I am fortunate to have been able to walk down.  I'm thankful for a mom who cares and has always done the best that she knows how to make our lives enjoyable.  I am thankful for a dad who is so smart, knows the answers, is wise, knows how to fix broken things, can build anything and never fails to make me laugh.  I am thankful for a brother who is sweet, will break his back to do anything for me, is one of the funniest people in my life and works hard to go after his dreams.
3. I am thankful for Cornerstone Summit.   I serve in the best, most encouraging church body anywhere around and I count it a huge blessing to be surrounded with the most selfless volunteers and by people who are always always servants first. 
4. I am also thankful to serve under the most selfless and encouraging and loving Pastor in Boone.  Even in transition, his faith and certainty in the Lord is amazing.  His sacrifice is unreal and it is truly an honor to be under someone who cares so much about his people.
5. I am thankful for the concept of discipleship and for a leader who has more grace, love and wisdom than I could even think about having. 
6. I am thankful to be in Boone, pursuing my dreams (literally) and for a house to live in with the most wonderful and encouraging roommate ever.
7. I am thankful for a job that I absolutely love, and I'm so thankful for the patience of those who have helped to shape and develop me professionally.  I'm also thankful to be a part of a ministry that is literally and tangibly making a difference in the world daily.
8. I am thankful for the close friends in my life.  The girls who never let me be upset for long.  The girls who give a lot of themselves to do life with me.  I'm thankful for so many memories, so much laughter, and long and meaningful conversations that will never be forgotten.
9. I am thankful for my sweet, loving and Godly husband.  He'll be here one day.
10. I am thankful that my needs are met, my bills are paid, my car is running, my house is functional, my pantry is full, my sickness is healed, my body is whole, my dreams are peaceful, my mind is at ease, my heart is happy and my life is complete. 
11. I am thankful that there is none like Jesus and that He trusts me to do His work.  I am also thankful that there's grace for when I fail more than I succeed and forgiveness for when I'm disobedient.
12. I am thankful for the "extras" in life, the things that are blessings above and beyond what I could ever need or deserve.
13. I am thankful for the nations and for all of the beautiful people all over the world.  I work in a place where I get to see those faces often and send doctors to help bring medical answers to them and that is the biggest blessing.
14. I am thankful for laughter.  Truly laughing can make any circumstance not as heavy as it once was.  I'm thankful for the people who know how to make me laugh.
15. I am thankful for the talents and gifts that the Lord has placed within me.  I don't deserve them at all, but I am thankful that the Lord gave them anyway.
16. I am thankful for life.  I'm thankful for the ability to love.  I'm thankful to be where I am doing what I'm doing and being able to say it's only because of the redemptive power of Jesus Christ that I am where I am. 

You see, this life is just blessing after blessing.  Even as the storms rise up, the good always makes the bad seem insignificant.  I challenge you to bring to mind just how thankful you are today.  Writing those things down helps to remind us that gratitude is truly the biggest gift, but also the biggest challenge.  Times might be rough, but we can still be thankful.  When we say "thank you", the problems that were once too big to conquer are suddenly not so big.  So, thank you, Lord, for blessing me beyond all my imaginable desires.

who are you on the boat?

As I've been reading lately all these really awesome stories about heroic people in the Bible who did incredible things because of the living power of Jesus Christ, a question has been resonating in my spirit.  "Laura, who are you on the boat?"  Well that's so easy and I'm glad you asked!!!!!  NOT.  As I've been pondering this question, I've been realizing that I have no idea who I am on the boat.  Am I Peter in Matthew 14?  He had some insecurities, but when push came to shove he stepped over the ledge and walked to Jesus on the water.  Am I one of the disciples in Mark 4?  They had really great intentions, but when the pressure was high, they threw out their intentions and were consumed by fear.  I want to be Peter, but I think I'm closer to being one of those disciples. 

When life brings on the pressure and the bad news outweighs the good news, are you Peter?  Am I Peter?  When you're faced with the reality that the "C word" has invaded your family and is rampaging against the people you love the most, do you stand in victory or seize up in fear?  Right now, I want to tell you that I'm good, I'm standing in victory, I'm believing the best, I'm interceding and pursuing the right things.  But I have to tell you this:  I hate cancer.  It's scary and unpredictable.  I hate that it's affecting people that I love more than anything.  I believe that the power of Jesus is bigger than the realities of the world and I know that regardless of the outcomes of my days, I can and will still praise the Lord because He's still good.  I'm just telling you that I wish I knew with more certainty who I was on the boat.  I wish I could run to my family and shift their fear into praise and turn their hardened hearts into new hearts eager to seek after the goodness of God.  I feel like Peter during the part of the story where he looks down and realizes that he's on the water and immediately begins to sink because he shifted his focus.  My eyes went from Jesus ahead to water below.

Here's the thing:  Before Peter looked down, before he even stepped out, he cried out with boldness to Jesus and asked for the miracle.  Halfway through the miracle, he doubted, but the point is that he asked first.  When we want to see things happen, regardless of our fear, we have to ask for those things to happen.  If Peter wouldn't have asked, he may have never known in that same way of his grave need for Jesus.  If the Lord hadn't designed our lives to encounter circumstances where the pressure rises, we may never have the opportunity to realize fully just how much we need a savior.  I'm thankful for the pressure, not for the actual specifics of the circumstances, but for the pressure that calls out my fear and forces it to turn into faith.     

The great thing about this story is that Jesus reached down and grabbed Peter and pulled him up before he sunk all the way in above his head.  Water might be below and I might be heavier than water, but Jesus makes the call and he's grabbing my arms before I lose the battle to the water.  I'm trying to shift my paradigm from world fearing to God fearing.  Jesus died for my fear.  I'm trying to be able to say with certainty that even though I'm aware of the water below, my eyes will forever stay fixed on Jesus ahead.  I'm trying to embody a life of joy from the minute I wake up to the minute I fall asleep because even though my circumstances are overwhelming, my heart is full of the everlasting and sustaining love of the Lord.  And I believe it can happen.  The Bible doesn't say how Peter felt after Jesus picked him up out of the water, but I'd be willing to bet that he felt overwhelmed.  If I could guess at the thoughts in his mind, I would guess that even though his flesh would be casting out feelings of shame for looking down, that his joy filled heart felt relief at the tangible work of the savior of the world. 

I said earlier that I didn't know who I was on the boat, but as the pressures rise, I just want to be Peter.  My flesh might fail me, but I need a savior, and He won't ever fail me.  Water below, but eyes ahead on Jesus.  Pray for my family, friends.     

...whether they listen to you or not.

"Then he added, "Son of man, let all my words sink deep into your own heart first.  Listen to them carefully for yourself.   Then go to your people in exile and say to them, 'This is what the Soverign LORD says!'  Do this whether they listen to you or not."  Ezekiel 3: 10-11

Immediately preceding the above passage, the Lord instructs Ezekiel to go and tell the nations about his word.  He says, in short, that his assignment in itself is easy, it's the woundedness that will follow the reaction of the people that will prove to be the hardest part for Ezekiel.  Have you ever thought of our assignment here on earth as followers of Christ?  It's E-A-S-Y...Jesus already did the hard part.  He endured the physical suffering, the ridicule, the hate and ultimately the sacrifice of life in order that we might be covered.  Our assignment is to tell everyone that we can about the great and wonderful truth that we believe with our whole hearts.  Easy, right?  Well, sure, the telling part would be so easy if every single person you told (either with your words or with your actions) jumped right on board, accepted the truth, and committed right then and there to walk beside you the rest of your days and uphold you and agree with you about telling others.  The problem is that that scenario doesn't happen.  In reality, we muster up the courage to tell of what we know to be true and then the first wound occurs leading to our own personal discouragement.  Consequently, the next time we muster up the courage, we count our woundedness as a predecessor, making it harder and harder to share our hearts with others.

To be transparent, I'm reminded of my last mission trip to Mexico.  I've been on countless other mission trips, but this was the first 'large-scale' mission trip that I personally put all the leg work into making happen.  That means my dad didn't help me (and by help me I mean do 98% of the work) write a support letter or help me find addresses of people to send them to.  My parents didn't pay the deposit or make sure that in the end my lack of financial support was covered.  In fact, when I intially informed them, they were both not even on board for me to go.  I remember thinking as I tried to condense my ever-excited mind into a one page support letter that it was going to be awesome to see the reactions of all of my cherished family and friends as they received the update on my life and partnered with me (at least in prayer) for my time in mission.  Then I sent my letters and eagerly awaited the reactions.  My results were less than satisfactory to say the least (and please, know that I am not talking about money).  Those family and friends that I wanted the most to say that they were praying for my trip didn't even mention that they had received the letter.  Those that I wanted the most to have my back were the least enthusiastic about this next huge step in my life.  I'll be honest, that hurt.  I poured my heart out in a letter and in many phone calls about being so excited to go to another nation and share the love of Christ and I got hurt in return.  I was wounded, and my woundedness made it harder for me to ever have the desire again to share with my family and friends about what the Lord was calling me to do.

Here's the thing...if I took that experience and let those emotions dictate my future steps in ministry, well my ministry would have ended right then and there.  However, I recognize that being wounded is a part of being in ministry.  People not supporting you...well, it happens.  Those that you love the most being the least excited...well, that happens too.  But then there's the few in your life that support you in all that you do, whether they agree or not, and those people serve as a reminder that no matter how the Lord calls you, you're equipped to love as He loves.  The wounds, though they happen, remind us that as Jesus was telling all of those people about who he was and what he had been sent to do, he was persecuted.  Jesus had 12 solid supporters, out of thousands, TWELVE, and really He had eleven.  Woundedness is a gift designed to keep reminding you that it's a process, and you're called to hold on.  So, keep sharing your heart.  Keep saying what you know is true, and do it confidently.  It's not easy, but if it were easy we wouldn't have to share, because everyone would already know.

Thanks to the Lord and his revealing spirit, to a pastor that absolutely loves his people and wants to share his wisdom, and to a leadership class that has proven to be one of the most effective and influential things I have ever been a part of, I now understand that woundedness is a gift.  It takes faith to love others.  It takes faith to share your heart with them and be vulnerable.  But, if just one person recognizes the God in you, it's so worth it.  AND, even if you never meet that one person, it's still so worth it.  I now have an even deeper appreciation of the head of my 'house' who, on a much much larger scale than I, has to face the woundedness and allow the hurt to make him stronger.  You can't just stop sharing the goodness of the Lord because of your emotional need to be approved of by others, and I now understand that on a much more solid level.   

The blessing is in the woundedness.  The honor is in the humility.  The power is in the word.  The encouragement is in the sacrifice.  You are called.  You are capable.  You will make a significant Kingdom impact.   

love never fails you.

Today I've been thinking about how much more we are willing to sacrifice for a person or thing when we love that person or thing.  I don't think many people would disagree with me on that.  It's interesting that when something is covered in love, forgiveness and grace just flow naturally.  When the verdict is out on love, it's harder to find the desire to sacrifice and be flexible to accomodate for specific needs.  Love, after all, matters the most. 

When you love something, you make time for that thing.  You don't have to check your schedule and make sure you can fit that thing in, you just fit it in.  You protect that thing with everything you've got.  You believe in that thing even when it can't believe for itself.  Love covers everything, love never fails.  Sacrificing for what you love is natural, it makes sense, there is not another option.  Mistake after mistake, love fills in gaps, love reminds us of the good times, love gives us hope and confidence that there is more.  Love NEVER fails you.

Now, think about how the Lord loves you.  He loves you with an unconditional and a relentless love.  He is jealous for you.  He will make every sacrifice necessary to seek after your heart.  He'll pour out grace and love until there is no more just for you.  Jesus wept when he realized what was happening around him.  He wept over you.  He wept until there were no more tears.  Love was there the whole time.  What the Lord has covered in love he will ALWAYS pursue after.  There's no thing, no word, no thought that we could do or have that would derail his purpose.  Understanding the revelation of the Lord's love for y.o.u. will give you understanding and peace that transcends beyond anything that could ever be processed or understood according to natural means.  He loves you because he loves you because he loves you because he loves you because that's just who he is.  You are never out of the realm of the grasp of the Lord.  Believe it about yourself.  Believe it about your circumstances.  You heart is now and always will be redeemable.  There is no greater love than that.

Today, be encouraged knowing that the things that you need to see happen for the people that you love are coming your way.  You will see them happen.  Because love never fails you.  God is love, and God never fails, therefore love never fails.  Keep covering those areas and relationships where you feel stretched and challenged in love.  Love even when you don't feel like loving, because love will never fail you.  Your promise is greater than your pain, and your future is better than your past.  Our praise and faith are not predicated upon our circumstances and mistakes (thank the Lord).  Today is the day to believe that there's something greater for you.  Start loving like you've never loved before.  Love the Lord, love yourself, love your family (all of them), love your friends, love your job, love your season of life...love it all.  When you start covering things in love, you de-activate the enemy's potential to attack those things.  Because love is greater than struggle.  Promise is greater than pain.

...and because love never fails you.   

back to the foundation.

The foundation of a thing is seriously the most important part of that thing.  Foundations uphold the integrity of a structure.  Without a foundation, a structure cannot stand.  This is true for houses & buildings & relationships & workplace decisions & life in general.  If the foundation is built hastily, the structure will eventually collapse.  Now, let's talk about structures collapsing...this isn't always the end of the world; sometimes structures need to collapse.  I know, you're thinking "What in the world is this girl talking about? Why would a structure ever need to collapse?"  Just hear me out, in five minutes it will all make sense...promise.

Sometimes in life we are faced with decisions that are easy to make.  Then there are difficult decisions to make.  The beauty in being faced with a difficult decision is that you automatically begin building the foundation of that thing slowly, because it's not an easy decision to make.  You take adequate time to think and then to build, to pray and then to build, to process and then to build.  When decisions are easy to make, we run the risk of hastily building up the foundation.  Our eyes and hearts and desires are so anxious to see the finishing of the structure that we pay little or no attention to the most important part: the foundation.

Moving on to the area of relationships.  (To those faithful reader(s) of this blog, you know right now I'm not talking about romantic relationships because I'm a big proponent of speaking only when you know what you're talking about.  Obviously, in this season of my life, I wouldn't know what I was talking about if I was speaking only on those kind of relationships, so please be enlightened; here I am talking about any relationship - mostly of the friendship variety.)  Relationships are one of the most essential areas in our lives where the foundation has got to be built the right way.  It's hard because (and I'm being candid here) sometimes we just want to jump right in to relationships with no regard to time.  No limits, no regrets, no boundaries.  What happens when we take this route is when we're fully invested and feel like we know all there is to know about a particular relationship (we've climbed to the top floor of the structure), we notice that the foundation is cracked, wobbly or sinking.  What goes up in haste comes crashing down in haste.  Don't be discouraged by this, because sometimes when our foundations are cracked and our structures have to come down, we have an incredible opportunity to do something great: rebuild.

There is beauty in the rebuild.  It will be difficult and challenging at times, that's just real life.  Setting boundaries after there have been none is not fun.  While you're rebuilding, you can't help but think about how you wish that you never had to start over, but then the Lord steps in and reminds you of two important things.  One:  while you're rebuilding, you have to start over from the beginning.  The past has to be the past.  You have to start over with priveleges and trust and all of that.  Two:  Things that are built the right way, even if they are being built for the second or third or eighth time are sweeter and stronger.  Things that are rebuilt are seasoned, and things that are seasoned always have more to offer.  It's okay if you have to rebuild the structure, but remember the foundation.  What a thing is built on top of determines the integrity that surges through that entire thing.

Yes, sometimes structures need to collapse for the sake of making sure the foundation is filled with all of the right things.  But that's ok, because when you start over, the process means way more.  You're congnizant of all of the right things.  Build, or rebuild, your life, decisions, relationships and motives on love, joy and encouragement.    

rejoice!

Do you ever just focus on the goodness in the journey?  This blog is entitled "The Beautiful Journey", and through every circumstance, trial, victory, triumph, joy, pain and season I've been able to count it all joy and call my life beautiful.  That could only be the Lord.  I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that there is nothing that comes your way that you cannot choose to walk through, learn something from and rejoice at the end.  I'm only writing this to emphasize the significance of rejoicing.  Life isn't easy, but we are called to live.  The time and the season is right now and always to lift your hands and rejoice.  Rejoice that the Lord blessed you with a life and use that life giving of yourself and blessing others.  The risks and challenges sometimes outweigh the benefits, but if we always did things in accordance to how much we benefitted, we'd never learn lessons (sometimes the lessons are the benefits).  If you spend your time focusing on why things are the way they are you miss out on the time that is intended to be time of growth.  Your perspective shifts when you realize that through the great times and especially through the tough times, the Lord is still good.  Take it easy today, be filled with joy about how great the Lord is and how intentional he is about guiding us, and rejoice.

I just stopped by real quick to encourage you today.